Use the "Back" button on your browser.
To return to the main TV Barn page:
Click here or on the Barn logo.
The Tall Guy (1989) 
Full IMDb listing
I'm recommending "The Tall Guy," though I have to go against an important principle to do so. I'm a man of few prejudices, and all of them are about films and television. They're self-defense mechanisms. Each of them was installed after I'd been pummeled mercilessly by some new wanton act of filmmaking.
Take "Rabbit Test," Joan Rivers' 1978 directorial debut. "Rabbit Test" was the touching story of a man (Billy Crystal) who gets pregnant after having sex on top of a pinball machine. Even the fundamental wrongness of this entire project was thrown into shadow by the submolecular-level evil permeating the poster, in which Joan — wearing a sweatshirt reading "DIRECTOR PERSON" — is seen leaning into Billy's swollen belly with an ear cocked and her then-probably-only-five-surgeries-along face smiling into the camera, twisted into an expression which I suppose was meant to say, "And just imagine the sort of wackiness that I actually put in the film!" In truth, her expression seems to be saying "Damn, I forgot you're supposed to take the painkillers before the sedatives, not after."
And then and there a new rule was born: Never, ever, ever, ever under any circumstances see any movie in which the director makes an appearance as the director of the film. Maybe the appearance itself won't be so excrementally bad, but you know, it's like suddenly discovering that your chiropractor is wearing a set of nipple rings. Your confidence in the person's fundamental decision-making ability is shot forever and you're not eager to put yourself in his hands.
A few months later, I saw Carl Reiner's appearance in "The Jerk," and I knew I was committed to this sound principle.
So yes, at the very end of "The Tall Guy" director Mel Smith does indeed appear dressed like Eric Von Stroheim (or Rita Moreno in "The Electric Company," if you will), setting down his megaphone to pivot in his director's chair and wink at the camera. But I'm willing to let it go. It occurs in the end credits and besides, "The Tall Guy" is a wonderful movie.
Jeff Goldblum is Dexter King, an American actor who arrived in England some years earlier, hoping to make it big in London's theater discrict. Though not a successful actor, he is a working actor: he gets beaten and humiliated (and paid) on a regular basis as the anonymous straight man in a hit one-man comedy revue starring the rubber-faced Ron Anderson (played by the rubber-faced Rowan Atkinson). His life has long-since settled into a dull routine of matinee and evening performances when he seeks relief from seasonal allergies and is smitten by a straight-laced nurse.
It's impossible to witness King's pursuit of Nurse Kate Lemmon without reflecting on one's own attempts at being Captain Smooth. The method Dexter's chosen is to eschew his usual batch of pills for a series of weekly shots administered by Kate. (How Freudian.) And when the month's worth of visits is up and he still hasn't mustered the courage to even ask her out, he returns with a story about an upcoming trip to Morocco, a region which (his landlady advised him) mandates a long and painful program of innoculations.
And you know, having massive golfball-sized boluses of serum stabbed into you on a regular basis is no more attractive to me than it is to you, but let's give credit where credit's due: it does give you a chance to try out nearly a dozen lame opening lines. Eventually, the one that gets Dexter that first date is "I think you're pretty and nice and would you like to talk some more over dinner?" which tells you all you need to know about Nurse Kate, particularly because the line is helpfully supplied by Kate herself. We are so used to seeing idiotic female characters, particularly in comedies, that when we're presented with one who is both highly intelligent and highly perceptive, we — okay, I — start going back and hating those previous films retroactively.
"The Tall Guy" really takes off once Dexter's fired from his show. After a series of auditions for productions that will be familiar (and funny) to anyone who follows Masterpiece Theater or British films, he lands a real plum: the title role in Elephant!, an Andrew Lloyd-Webber-esque musical about the Elephant Man. It's so funny because it's just so perfect. Parody is a tricky, tricky business. Every good parody has to have truth at its center. Parody something poorly and, as typically happens to "Saturday Night Live" cast members, you'll get a flowery, mock-horrified letter from the parodee and an invitation to drop by sometime for a photo op. Do it as devastatingly and as accurately as Elephant! spears the entire modern overblown crowd-pleasing hit-making mess of musical theater, and your target climbs into bed and stays there for a year or two.
"The Tall Guy" was written by Richard Curtis, who was also one of the major creative forces behind the legendary "Blackadder" series, and with Atkinson created the hugely popular "Mr. Bean" franchise. (Aside: Curtis has worked closely with Atkinson for well over a decade. Atkinson's character and Atkinson himself are stage performers known for doing largely pantomimic comedy. Both are into fast cars. Rowan Atkinson. Ron Anderson. Ron Anderson is a total bastard. Hmm?)
And we see much of what Curtis seems to do best. If The Tall Guy has a failing, it's that the story isn't given as much attention as the script's huge assortment of quirky situations and characters. But hey, it's hard to notice what you're missing when you're confronted by what is hands-down the funniest (and sadly, most accurate) sex scene ever committed to film.
Back to the Andy Ihnatko archive
© 2000 Andy Ihnatko. May not be redistributed without permission. Studio PR types wishing to send Andy tapes, promotional clothing, or high-end video gear in hopes of securing a positive review are advised that such efforts are futile, but they're free to try to determine how high Andy's price actually is. Mail any and all pelft to Box 279, Norwood, MA 02062. He could use a new subwoofer for his home-theater setup.
Search TV Barn